Outlined in the Image and Likeness of PowerPoint (or something like that)

I’ve created hundreds, no, maybe thousands of PowerPoint presentations; and I’ve sat though many more created by others. Nowadays, there are dozens of alternatives to PowerPoint that all claim to offer better and more interesting presentations; however, the social and cognitive damage is irreversible, and PowerPoint is only partly to blame.

You may not be old enough to recall comedian Jackie Vernon and his slide-show routine. There was no slide show, but Jackie did use a real hand clicker to dramatize the transitions between imaginary and painfully boring slides. Brilliant! I hope PowerPoint or one of the new applications includes a “Jackie Vernon click” audio file option for slide transition.

At some point, but I’m not exactly sure when, but it’s related to PowerPoint somehow, presenters and audiences became anxious, couldn’t wait for the presentation to end, and realized deep down that time was money. First, the siesta was eliminated, along with all tangible and intangible cultural artifacts and political ideologies associated with it. Then came the bullet. They tried seven bullets for a while, but that took too much time. So they laid off four bullets, and went with three. This happened with both blah, blah, blah and yada, yada, yada. All went from seven to three, just like that! We don’t have time to discuss how the Holy Trinity had set the socio-theological precedent or why the Seven Stooges one day during the Great Depression suddenly became the Three Stooges. We’ll leave that for a future post.

Rather, let us focus on how PowerPoint has helped shape the way we think, the way we talk, and even the way we look. [A couple of years ago I sketched this doodle on notebook paper during a PowerPoint presentation that I wanted to end quickly … because I was about six feet away from a tray of donuts and an urn of coffee.]

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Hair Conditioner for Offensive Lineman

Every team has at least one. Football players with long, flowing hair, hair, by the way, with special needs, especially on offense! Now, you can be the one. You and your hair can run with the ball just like the pros. Game on!

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South Side DSM

Our 7th floor king size bed, South Side facing, morning view shed…
Our days are numbered.

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Soft-Serve CFLs

General Electric and Dairy Queen have partnered in the development of FluoroFlo® technology to deliver soft-serve CFLs that are lower in milk-fat (3% to 6%) than the old-fashioned incandescent varieties (10% to 18%).

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Illumination and Nocturnal Emission

Incandescence is a hot subject these days, especially in light of how cool fluorescence is becoming in some circles. When this occurred to me last night, a light bulb went off, and I realized something was different but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

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Just Another Night … Take My Wife-Please

Why didn’t I think of this in the first place?
(Here’s what I mean by “the first place.” I did this same drawing in another post entitled Stand-Up Anthropology with a different twist and corresponding word bubble roughly related to the old comedic phrase, take my wife. As I was doing that post, it occurred to me that it might be even more anthropologically relevant and perhaps funnier, per se, for a female comedian to utter that old line in a regular comedy-club setting.)

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Stand-Up Anthropology

$20.00 says there’s a cultural alternative to “Take my wife – please.”

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What would Henny Youngman say?

Precious Water

As we move from the Hartford of the West (Des Moines, IA) to the Gateway to Yosemite (Merced, CA), from the nation’s breadbasket to not far from its salad bowl, we’ll have to keep an eye on water like never before.  Water is a finite and precious resource practically everywhere, and this is especially true in the San Joaquin Valley.

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City of Merced, Gateway to Yosemite

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Nobody Likes Change (or Complexity)

I once heard a change-management consultant tell a conference room full of hospital administrators, physicians, and staff … “the only person who likes change is a baby with a wet diaper.” (Hey, I subsequently dealt with this image, click here to see.) I was one of those administrators in that conference room in New Orleans about six months after Hurricane Katrina at a hospital whose survival depended upon a very deliberate and systematic organizational transformation; and yet the natural forces of resistance to change – among the victimized and exhausted few who were not temporarily or permanently displaced – were functional and ready for a good fight. It’s only natural. However, there was no alternative in this case. The organizational and structural changes simply had to take place and the resistance to change had to become collaboration in change; and this happened in large part due to an extraordinarily unique combination of chronic passion (joie de vivre) and acute Katrina fatigue in an extraordinarily unique context in an extraordinarily unique city.

However, when the need for change is perceived as optional and any sense of urgency is a matter of opinion, development efforts can drag on for years, resistance to change can become business as usual, and collaboration can be confined to ongoing turf battles. Even when complicated baseline findings of the communities’ perceived needs are available and displayed along side the communities’ complicated aspirations for all to compare, there can be voices crying out for simplicity and ease … but not for change.

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If I ever do this again, I’ll try to remember to start off with that catchy quote about the baby, the diapers, and change, which reminds me of a drawing/post I have up my sleeve about calzones and how I suspect that this term, which means pants, really comes from little, little pants…diapers?  The fullness of diapers?

Ney & Tombak

One of these days I’ll tell the story of how I became familiar with traditional Persian music. It has been a love affair of more than 30 years! On one of our flights back from CA to IA I was listening to a beautiful piece that featured the Persian ney and tombak, and this little drawing was inspired. If you’re not familiar with this music or these instruments, then I simply suggest that you look them up on YouTube. It’s been a long day; otherwise, I would supply a link or two.

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